Who Says

You made me insecure,

Told me I wasn’t good enough.

But who are you to judge

When you’re a diamond in the rough.

I’m sure you got some things

You’d like to change about yourself.

But when it comes to me

I wouldn’t want to be anybody else.

I’m no beauty queen

I’m just beautiful me

You’ve got every right, to a beautiful life.

Who says, who says you're not perfect?

Who says you're not worth it?

Who says you're the only one that's hurtin'?

Trust me, that's the price of beauty

Who says you're not pretty?

Who says you're not beautiful?

The path to gaining self respect- Selena Gomez says it best in her song, Who Says. The remarkable thing about self esteem is that YOU are in complete control of it. People may judge you or criticize you, in fact they will judge you and criticize you, but you are the one in command.

And yes, it is much easier said then done, to ignore what others say and think, but once you choose to do that and you choose to believe in yourself, you will blossom.

What is the harm in being confident and poised? If this is your outlook, I do not see any results other than success and happiness in your future.

Stay True to You

It happens to everyone, every year. You join a new community- whether it be a club, class, job, or any sort of unfamiliar environment and immediately you feel a desire to fit in. It is simple human nature to want to be accepted by your peers. It gives a person a feeling of comfort and a sense of worth. But where exactly is the fine line between fitting in and losing yourself?

In the movie Mean Girls, when Cady joins “the plastics” she begins to present herself differently. Not only in the way that she dresses, but how she behaves, sets her priorities, and treats her body. We all know how the movie ends, she finally realizes the monster that she has become and it ends happily with her finding herself again.

As human beings, we are all far from perfect and it is very easy to get caught up in a similar situation to Cady. The catch is that it may not be so easy to find yourself again, therefore it is important to recognize when you are not being true to yourself. To do this simply ask, are you doing what makes you truly happy? Does the environment that you surround yourself with provide you with true bliss and fulfillment?

From my own experiences, there have been times when I constantly compare myself to those I am surrounded by. I feel that my lifestyle should match theirs, and if it does not there is something wrong with me therefore I should conform. And sometimes I do conform; but it is in these moments, I realize that I am in my weakest and lowest state of mind.

So what does all of this have to do with fashion or Eating Disorder Awareness Week? A very simple and affective way to change your image is through your choice of clothing, which is why it is one of the easiest ways to loose a true sight of yourself. Simply because everyone else is wearing an item, is not a good enough reason for you to also wear a particular piece of clothing or trend.

And somewhat similar to fashion, developing an eating disorder is a method that seems to be simple and affective in transforming your body, therefore your imagine. The greatest difference with this approach is that it is certain that you will lose sight of yourself and it is extremely difficult to recover from. Comparable to fashion, just because it seems that everyone else is very skinny or obsessing over their bodies, is not a valid excuse for you to also.

One’s sense of fashion and one’s sense of body image provide ample opportunities to create unbalance and a lost sense of direction. But with a clear cut path, along with strength and positive reinforcement, they can provide a rich amount of opportunities to build an unstoppable and confident force within oneself. 

Stylish Choices

So how does one exactly live a fashionable life? Well I can tell you one thing- it is much more than owning the most expensive pair of shoes, having perfectly blown out hair, or obsessing over perfection. In reality, it is a much simpler concept than that- it is entirely about the lifestyle that you live. Based upon the choices that you make, you can evolve your life into filled of pure bliss and happiness. By consistently making these stylish choices, you’ll discover an entirely new meaning to the world lifestyle.

1. Surround yourself with inspiring and compassionate people.

2. Eliminate negative thoughts and choose to believe in yourself. After all, the only thing holding you back is yourself.

3. Respect your body by providing it with proper nutrition, rest, and healthy amounts of exercise.

4. Dress yourself in a manner that exclaims to the world that you respect yourself, therefore you demand respect from the world also.

5. Give love to others, and the world will show you love back.

Dress to Impress Occasions

Ever since you were a child and your mother dressed you, you knew there were certain occasions that required you to dress more formally- church, school dances, working opportunities, and many more. But hopefully these traditions have turned into habits that as young or full grown adults. It is essential to understand the importance of dressing oneself up. But there are five more occasions that are apart of a weekly or monthly routine that you should make efforts towards. They are all events that by dressing up for, you will find yourself excelling at and in return fueling your confidence which will allow you to do your best in every area of life. Then again you will find yourself shinning in these activities even more from your newly elevated self esteem and the cycle will begin again. Take a look below at the five opportunities you have to kick start this sensation.

Working Out

·      The standard baggy t-shirt and sweatpants just won’t cut it if you want to perform your best. Try wearing bright and fun colors and prints as well as mixing it up with various tank tops, leggings, and track jackets. The market for active apparel has expanded tremendously and much of its clothing is acceptable for wearing outside of the gym as well.

Classes/Exams

·      By dressing up for class, you’ll be motivated to pay attention, confident enough to participate in class and ask questions, as well as impress your classmates and professors. And by dressing nicely for exams, it is a subtle sign to yourself that you dressed your best, now you are going to do your best.

Presentations

·      Whether you are standing in front of a small group of people or an audience hall of people, you are going to give your great presentation by feeling your greatest which stems from dressing your at your finest. Not only will you look professional, but you will seem as if you know what your doing, in every aspect.

Meeting Someone Knew

·      You never know when a simple encounter could turn into a lifelong friendship, romantic relationship, or useful networking opportunity therefore you should always make a fantastic first impression and dress accordingly.

A Busy Day

·      If your day is filled with running errands, working, classes, appointments, and social events- dress up; that way you will look presentable for all of these events and you spirits will be lifted, giving you the energy and motivation to complete all the necessary tasks. In addition, if some spontaneous opportunity comes up, you will be well dressed and supplied with confidence to take on whatever challenge comes your way.

Count What Matters

It seems that we as a society revolve our lives around numbers- how much money we have, grades in school, or how much time we have wasted on a task. But what about the numbers we count in regards to our bodies- calories consumed, weight gained, or the size of our clothing. Instead of focusing on detailed and insignificant numbers, why not focus on the bigger picture and count what really matters- your blessings and fantastic qualities.

First, let’s address the behavioral or more abstractly beautiful things about you. Are you an excellent scholar, an intense listener, or have an infectious sense of humor? As far as skin deep assets would you say you are compassionate, thoughtful, patient, passionate, well mannered? These traits, as well as many more are plenty of things to make you feel proud and worthy of yourself.

Want to count some blessings that are a bit more closer to the surface? Well do you have healthy fingers nails that just hold all nail polishes well? Or beautiful long eyelashes? What about you skin tone, can you rock a bright tangerine orange like no one else? What makes physical feature do you have that makes you stand out in society? Or do you possess a ethnic feature that makes you proud of your heritage? Many of these small details are qualities that are often overlooked but are worthy of showing off.

After answering these questions and doing some further self reflection, try doing the following. During a time when you are feeling sensational and overjoyed at all you have accomplished, count what matters by writing down seven aspects from these two categories that you love about yourself. That way, when you are experiencing a rough patch of shame and insecurity, you can look back at this list and be reminded of why you should be grateful. We all possess beauty internally and on the surface, so keep track of what matters and choose to look past your inhibitions.

EDAW

Today, Sunday February 26^th begins the first day of Eating Disorder Awareness Week, EDAW, sponsored by the National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders, also known as ANAD. It is a week devoted to educating society about eating disorders, as well as reminding the masses the importance of respecting our bodies. So what exactly does EDAW have to do with FashionMatterns, or fashion in general?

Fashion and self confidence have everything to do with each other, and their link explains why it is that I am pursuing a career in fashion. How you choose to dress yourself each day has powerful effects on your self esteem. Even if you may be feeling self conscious about your body one particular day, by simply wearing an outfit that you love, your self esteem can soar.

The well known celebrity stylist, Rachel Zoe has explained this sensation well by saying,

 “I’m a firm believer in the adage that it is what’s on the inside that ultimately counts. I mean, who doesn’t subscribe to that? But there is plenty of virtue in aesthetics, too. And a smear of lip gloss and a bang-up haircut can have powerful results both inside and out.”

It is fashion that made me realize the respect that I owe to myself and my body. The feeling when you put on a dress that extenuates every curve properly, and hides all of your flaws, I live for that feeling. The way that I dress myself makes me feel unstoppable, worthy, and as if I can do anything. This transformative power that I have experienced with fashion is where I draw strength from to get over my fears and insecurities. I hope that by reading all of the upcoming posts for this week, you may learn that fashion is a friend that can help you feel strong while enduring the challenges of life.

Keep checking in and email me your thoughts at fashionmatterns@gmail.com

When In Doubt, Mood Board it Out

Unless you work in the fashion industry or are very passionate about the art of fashion and clothing, you probably are confused by the title of this article. Let me first tell you what a mood board is; a mood board is something we as creators and designers use in fashion to inspire us and give us a general sense of direction. To be more exact, it is typically a poster board with collaged images that have a general theme or idea unifying them. Urban dictionary defines a mood board to be, “A collage or collation of images and text expressing a certain topic or subject, often used to generate ideas or for project work” (Urbandictionary.com).

So why would a mood board be useful to anyone but fashion designers or artists? Well as I stated before, when you are in doubt, you should mood board it out. What I mean by this is, when you are feeling uninspired, unenthusiastic about your wardrobe, or overall lacking a sense of confidence, creating a mood board can give a renewed sense of life to the collection of clothing and accessories that you already own. Hanging up all over my closet are mood boards that I have created over the years. Every time I open up my closest to put together an outfit, I have a plentiful amount of inspiration, but more importantly a starting point to create my outfit.

When it seems as though you have a closest full of clothes, but nothing to wear, it can be helpful to turn to photo shoots, magazine advice, or really anything that you find aesthically interesting for help.

To better clarify this idea, let me give you an example. Being a broke college student, I do not have the resources to go out and buy an entire new wardrobe to work with for the upcoming winter season. So with the start of a new year and a new season, I thought it was time freshen up my outfits. I was very inspired by the recent ad campaign of the brand Ray-Bans. Their advertisements contain the phrase, “Never Hide”. From this slogan, I collected images that are portrayed this: bright pieces, eye catching textures, shiny bling, and of course a confident and alluring attitude.

When creating your mood board the only rule I have is that there are no rules. Simply gather anything and everything that inspires you and put it together on a board. For a more specific and direct sense, stick to a theme (but I have often found, by accident, a person collects pictures that have unifying elements without the person even realizing it). You cannot do wrong when creating a mood board. So do it up and do it big, and get inspired!